Job Description
SURF is looking for a CEO to sit in meetings, make questionable decisions, and take credit when things go well.
Key Responsibilities
- Look busy while doing very little.
- Attend meetings that could have been emails.
- Say things like "Let's circle back" and "Think bigger."
- Tell everyone to work harder.
- Make decisions based on vibes.
- Take credit for successes and blame the team for failures.
- Occasionally remember what SURF actually does.
- Post inspirational nonsense on LinkedIn.
Requirements
- Must own at least one expensive jacket.
- Ability to talk for 30 minutes without saying anything useful.
- Strong delegation skills (getting other people to do your work).
- Must know what EBITDA stands for, or be good at pretending.
- Absolutely no practical skills required.
Benefits
- Unnecessarily impressive job title.
- Unlimited coffee and self-importance.
- Flexible working hours (for yourself, not employees).
- Opportunity to say "I'm the CEO" at social events.
To Apply: Just declare yourself CEO. Apparently that's how it works.